Did someone once point out a flaw of yours and you didn’t exactly smile and say, “Thank you so much for that”? Or have you ever criticized someone and found they weren’t very receptive to you?
If we ever feel the need to bring someone’s negative trait or behavior to their attention, there’s an absolute prerequisite. We must first look inward and ask ourselves, where is this coming from? Do I truly love this person unconditionally and is that love what’s motivating me to help them? Or is it possible that my focus on their flaw is actually rooted in a personal bias or some discomfort I feel toward them? Am I, on some level, ‘enjoying’ the opportunity to highlight their weakness?
This week we learn that only a Kohen, a priest, could formally declare someone afflicted with ‘leprosy’ as ‘impure’. This declaration resulted in them being temporarily distanced from the community.
Why only a Kohen? Because they were also tasked with blessing the people with loving kindness. If someone needed to be distanced from the community, it could only come from someone whose role was grounded in care, compassion and unconditional love. That way, we could trust that the act of distancing was not motivated by judgment or resentment, but by deep love and concern for the others rehabilitation.
If you want your words to be heard and truly make a difference, make sure they come from a heart full of love. When someone knows they are loved, they can take in even the hardest truths.